Questions are the Magic of Conversations
There's only so much you can say about the weather before the conversation becomes a bore. How do you have small talk without always talking about yourself or standing in awkward silence? Avoiding that awkward moment when you've been talking so much about yourself (out of nervousness) that the conversation ends & you haven't asked about the other person. Now, you’re feeling exhausted and embarrassed. Or the silence becomes so thick you can’t breathe so you quickly walk away.
Either one isn't intentionally rude - but knowing what questions to ask that keep the dialogue moving can work magic on a conversation.
What to ask next? Ask yourself first, what are you interested in these days? What have you been wanting to know more about? Interested people are always seeking to learn and grow their knowledge base. Find something that person is doing that you want to know more about. Start asking questions.
Say, Travel. Summer is a great time to ask about recent or upcoming adventures. Where did they go? Stay? Eat? Like? Dislike? Wish they could've done? or Would do again? Find out these things. Ask thoughtful questions. Focus on that person being the most interesting person you've talked to recently. Treat them as such. Give them your full attention and ask questions that allow them to express themselves.
Conversations begin to flow easily once you’ve created a dialogue of comfort and trust. Allowing the another person to share their thoughts and feelings with you. Watch a person's face and see them light up when you ask thoughtful questions about their passions and hobbies.
If you are visiting or new to an area, ask what they enjoy doing locally. You can build great connections with people about their community. You can learn about events and groups that may not be in your main stream. Become interested in your community and the people making a difference.
Tip: often, if people ask you about something, they are eager to talk about how they relate to the subject. Before you give them a novel's worth of details about your latest adventure. Ask about their's first. You now have the opportunity to listen, learn, and to be interested. Listening is as important a skill in communication as talking.
You may never get a chance to share the amazing highlights of your latest adventure but your conversation mate leaves having shared their's and thinking you were a great conversationalist. Shift your mindset around small talk from: what am I going to talk about to what can I ask about next.
Bye Now.
